Mastering Toddler Tantrums #BigSteps

We all know toddlers have tantrums, they are inevitable and a very normal part of a toddlers development. It doesn't mean you are doing anything wrong, it doesn't mean they are naughty. At some point every child will have a tantrum!

The biggest tip I can give you is to stay cool, do not lose your temper. It's easy to say, and yes as a busy Mum of 4 I have found myself, on more than 1 occasion, having a bigger tantrum than the toddler but the key to dealing with a toddler tantrum effectively is to keep cool, stay calm and breathe.

We need to act fast...why are they are having the tantrum. Examine the situation as fast as possible. Maybe they dropped the toy they had hold of, we all know those lazy toddlers find it much easier to scream that they dropped the toy rather than just bend down and pick it up! Maybe they want something they can't reach. OK maybe they want something that someone else has in this case, move on to my next step.

In the case that they want something someone else has we need some fast and effective bribery diversions! A snack? A book? Maybe a similar toy. 

Can you bargain with them? Evie had a tantrum the other day because she missed nursery, she had fallen over on the way and decided she didn't want to go, then when it was time to pick the others up from school she decided she DID want to go to nursery. I diverted the tantrum by saying we would pop in and say hello instead!

Tune into your toddler and try and find out what causes them to lose their head the most. Is the tantrum because they want to be independent? Make time for them to put their own coat on before you leave the house. Maybe they have tantrums because they are tired? Could you move nap time or bedtime a little earlier? Are they more likely to tantrum when they are hungry, would it hurt to add a snack time into your morning or afternoon routine?  Maybe a reward chart would help?

None of the above working? Just walk away and count to 10 and remember it will pass. We can't win them all. Remember for every tantrum there is a cuddle. For every scream there is a squeeze. For every photo of them tantruming there is a photo of them smiling, and most of all remember at the exact moment that your child is laid on the floor screeching and you think that everyone in the nearby vicinty is staring at some point one of us fellow Mums has been in that exact spot (usually at the tills near the chocolate right?) in the exact situation.

Whether they are a mammoth meltdown or a teeny blip it's all just #BigSteps in a toddlers development. Arla Big Milk are asking for you to enter the #BigSteps competition by sharing a picture of your baby doing something for the first time to win some great prizes. You can follow Arla on Facebook and Twitter to keep up to date with them and enter some really exciting competitions.

I am a member of the Mumsnet Bloggers Network Research Panel, a group of parent bloggers who have volunteered to review products, services, events and brands for Mumsnet. I have not paid for the product or to attend an event. I have editorial control and retain full editorial integrity. I have received a voucher as a token of thanks for this post.


  1. This is brilliant advice. I always try to remember diversionary tactics. Little Miss H doesn't have tantrums that often. But we did have a humdinger in the middle of the high street. It ended with a homeless man accusing me of abducting my own daughter. I was not happy. And I definitely found it hard to keep calm in that instance. Hugs Mrs H xxxx

  2. My Toddler has just started to entered this stage so I read this with great interest. Great advice!

  3. My two year old daughter has tantrums all the time now. It's exhausting. I will try these tips.

  4. Staying calm is a big thing as it's so easy to lose it when they are. x

  5. Some great advice there, I admit I would be all up for bribery, can you tell I don't have children x

  6. Really good post. I used to be terrible when I was younger and now as an adult I feel so guilty for all my tantrums when I was little! I hope when I have a kid they aren't too bad haha x

  7. Great tips - Pickle is having the most EPIC screaming tantrums at the moment. It's hard work! Kaz x

  8. Bribery makes life so much easier but it certainly doesn't teach them about behaviors in the long run. I think tuning into your toddler is a great idea.

  9. So far so good as we didn't have a major melt down but I am sure it will come soon


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